Guest Bio
Fern lives on the Mornington Peninsula with her husband, children and Labrador, Jobe. Fern Schreuder is a Secondary School teacher and a mother to two small boys. She holds a Bachelor of Teaching and a Bachelor of Applied Science, specializing in Human Movement. The General's Log is her first book.
Meet the Author at Clunes - Fern Schreuder
With Fern Schreuder
Meet Fern Schreuder, author of 'The General's Log: Tales from the Lockdown' and 'The General's Log: Second Tour of Duty'
About 'The General's Log: Tales from the Lockdown'
WHAT DO YOU DO TO SURVIVE A PANDEMIC LOCKDOWN?!
The General's Log is a light-hearted, comical account of life in unexpected isolation with young children. The General is confined to the house with her husband, the Lieutenant General. Along with their two young children; Private First-Class A and Corporal R.
To keep themselves amused during the lock down, the Troops engage a variety of exercises designed to enhance skills and pass time the quickest way possible.
They set tasks and exercises to keep themselves at the top of their game and to assure themselves of becoming the best military family in the country during lockdown.
The General's Log outlines Lockdown training in:
-fort building with couch cushions.
-sentry duty in the garage
-artillery training in the form of farts
-stealing contraband from the pantry
-misfiring in the latrine leaving surprise puddles
-and many trips to the infirmary due to excess accidents in the field.
Entries get more ridiculous and hilarious as isolation time increases.
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About 'The General's Log: Second Tour of Duty'
THE GENERAL’S LOG: SECOND TOUR OF DUTY
‘We are free! We are free!’ came the joyful call from all the military survivors of the first pandemic lockdown.
The General was at her happiest and embraced the sunshine with all her relief…but then, it vanished again, and the brief illusion of hope and freedom was whisked from them…the general feared they would not survive the new lockdown…it was the end of sanity as she knew it…
The Troops are back after the mad cap hilarity of “The General’s Log: tales from the lockdown.” and they must now up the ante to keep amused during yet another lockdown. They engage in more artillery training, this time using lemons and face masks; they try their hand at making their own snack rations while unsupervised and continue their war on wearing pants. The battle-weary General tries to again navigate the list of house-hold items that could potentially become weapons, and which grows larger by the day.
The Second Tour of Duty is full of highs and lows and hilarious in-betweens of parenting small children while maintaining sanity during a global pandemic. (And we thought the Virus was the worst part…!?)
70 Service St, Clunes VIC 3370, Australia
"An enjoyable account of fun and frivolity during a very stressful and confusing time for young families...well done on this excellent tale of misadventures..."
— Gillian, Indie Books reviewer
"A classical styling of absurd situations in an absurd time of reference for any family and told with humility and reality that makes it all the more funny… because it's true… Well done Fern, you survived again!"
— Kate, Indie Books reviewer
We acknowledge the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognise their continuing connection to land, waters and culture.
We pay our respects to their Elders past, present and emerging.